Missing Pieces
by Kyra Renee
Summary: Yuki has left Cross Academy with the promise that she'll be ready when Zero comes for her life. But an unexpected meeting will take them both by surprise and leave them grasping for closure.
1. Prologue

Quiet.

Everything is so quiet. Not even the wind whispers against my window anymore. There is no sound, even when I close my eyes and listen to the lazy beating of my own heart.

I am alone here; more alone than I have ever been. But I'm surrounded by familiar faces and that should be enough.

Shouldn't it?

Feeling this way makes my heart ache; it reminds me how ungrateful I am. Hanabusa once told me that I was '_coddled_' and I believe him now. I _am_ coddled, just like a child. But I am not a child, not anymore. I have grown so much in the last few months that I feel... I feel...

Strange.

Stranger than I did when I first opened my eyes as a vampire; like seeing in color for the first time. The world was so bright but the darkness came soon after, dragging me along with it. There cannot be light without dark, I know that now. Just as there cannot be good without evil. Their contradiction is what brings harmony, though I still don't know where I stand.

Somewhere in the middle?

I know that's where I want to stand but the line drawn in the dirt is difficult to see, even with these glowing red eyes of mine. There's so much I still don't know and even more that I don't understand. But I _want _to understand. I want to know... I _need_ to know.

I should be happy here and I am. But something is still missing and I feel incomplete. I wonder if I'll ever feel complete again or if this is how it's just meant to be...

Forever...


	2. Chapter 1

I no longer feel confined to my gilded cage, though Kaname would wish otherwise. He has granted me permission to move freely on the condition that I dedicate the remainder of my time to my studies. There is still so much that I need to learn about myself and the life I was meant for, but I have time. I have all the time in the world.

The concept of time as a vampire is so different than time as a human; there is no end, only a beginning and fleeting moments in between. I never understood that until now. Mortality is a fickle thing and I still have yet to shed my silly human fears. What is there to fear when the very earth quakes beneath your feet and the trees bend to your power? Nothing. Nothing except the inevitable darkness.

I was never afraid of the dark until I could _feel_ it. The darkness was so much heavier than I ever imagined and sometimes it suffocates me. I know that it's part of me now, just as I am part of it. We make one entity, though I cannot say whether our union is harmonious yet or not. There are still too many unknown variables, but I never was very good with numbers.

"What are you giggling about?" The voice pulls me from my thoughts and I turn my head, closing my eyes to flash him a smile that still speaks of my innocence and youth. I can feel the flush in my cheeks giving my thoughts away, but I shake my head to dismiss it and blink at him.

"Nothing," I lie. He knows and I can see it in the way he looks at me with that impassive stare of his. "Just thinking about what I want to do today," I add, hoping that will pacify him for now.

"The sun is hidden behind the clouds, so I thought that I might go for a walk in town." Now I'm just talking to fill the silence. It's a nervous habit that I developed and one that I'm sure Kaname knows well by now. But if he's ever found it annoying, he never once said so and just like now, he always sat in silence and listened. Sometimes I wonder if he really _does_ listen to every word I say or if he just humors me, or perhaps even both. I want to ask him but the fear of upsetting him stills my tongue.

"What are you going to do today, Kaname?" I tie the green ribbon in my hair to keep some of it from falling into my face as I wait for his answer, knowing that whatever he tells me will be a vague half-truth. I learned to stop expecting anything more from him a long time ago but I still trust him. I will _always_ trust him, even when my gut tells me otherwise. Maybe that's love or maybe it's stupidity, I'm still not sure. But whatever it is, I know that Kaname would never hurt me. I know that with my heart.

"I have some things I need to take care of," his response is so casual and I glance over my shoulder as his long legs unfold from where they had been draped over the side of the chair. He makes everything look so effortless and even now I'm mesmerized by him. I didn't realize I had been holding my breath until his hand settled on top of my head and I can feel the heat burning in my cheeks again. "Stay out of trouble today, Yuki."

"I will!" He's already leaving, even as I sit there curling my hands tightly in my lap and struggle to maintain my cheerful smile. I must... _maintain_.

As I leave my bedroom behind and walk the quiet halls, I feel as though I'm leaving one world for another and I don't fully belong in either of them. But I can't tell any of them that and so I smile even though I don't get any in return, except from Hanabusa. Though I wouldn't call it a _smile. _He just looks at me differently than the others do and the same warning Kaname gave me is echoed as he calls out to me with at look that's meant to be impassive, but instead just looks distant and... sad. Everyone seems so sad all of the time and I wonder if that's because they miss Cross Academy or if there's something else; something that I still don't understand.

I miss the academy and the people that I left behind there: Headmaster, Sayori... _Zero_.

I see him, sometimes. Whenever I close my eyes he's always there. On a good night I can hear his voice echoing in my head, but on a bad night he doesn't come to me at all. My memories float like leaves on a pond and I can only touch them when they drift close enough. I know that I should let them go but they're all I have now and I can feel myself shaking with the effort to hold back the tears. I chose to leave with Kaname and the others, but I never thought that it would be this lonely.

_Zero_.

I often find myself wondering what he's doing and if he's alright. Does he ever think of me too? I don't know which would be worse: knowing that he does or knowing that he doesn't. Just like with Kaname, my feelings for Zero always had the opposite effect. The more I tried to protect and help him, the more I hurt him. Asking him to forgive me would be selfish but I want to see him, just once. I want to know that he's alright but I know that the next time I see Zero, he'll be coming for my life.

I told him that I'd be ready and I know that I will be. When I leave this world behind for good, I want it to be because of Zero. I owe him that much.

But I push my thoughts of Zero from my mind as I reach the edge of the quiet little town and begin wandering through the labyrinth of buildings and streets. I am no longer afraid to walk alone and I let myself drift lazily on the current from one merchant booth to another, threading silk through my fingers and sinking my teeth into sweet fruit fresh from the fields. There is peace here, unsullied by the greed of vampires or the senseless spilling of human-

_Blood_.

I can smell it on the air and it makes me stop. I wait, letting the juice of the fruit fill my mouth as I listen. I know it's close and before the fruit even hits the ground I'm running through the winding side streets. I can hear Kaname's voice in my head, telling me to stop and turn back. But I can't turn back, not when there's so much blood.

I mange to catch my breath as I round a corner, staring at the back of a Level E. "Hey!" The word is out before I can stop myself and the man drops the woman in his arms; I feel my body flinch as she hits the ground. The shrill laughter makes me shudder and I wonder how a beast so far gone had ever been human in the first place. It makes my skin crawl but I step forward anyway. I can take a Level E, even without a weapon to defend myself with and as it lunges, I push off from the ground and jump. Landing behind it easily, I pivot, ready to strike at the first opening I see when something collides with me from my left. Another Level E snaps at me, inches away from my face, and for a moment all I can do is stare. It's been a while since I saw one so close and I can smell the putrid stench of stale blood on it's breath. It's enough to make my stomach churn and with a solid kick to the stomach, I manage to push it off of me and get back to my feet as it reels back in pain and surprise.

The odds are still in my favor despite being outnumbered two to one, and I brace myself for another attack. But it never comes.

I know that sound; the ring of two gunshots fills my head to the point of bursting. There's nothing left of the Level E's now but dust, except I can't focus on their settling remains because all I can see from across the alley is...

"Zero?"


	3. Chapter 2

He doesn't speak, but I know he heard me. The air feels thick and my lungs ache as they squeeze painfully in my chest, expelling what little breath I had left. I cannot move but I want to run to him and when I finally dare to test the obedience of my feet, his eyes are on me and the Bloody Rose remains pointed at my head. He looks like a statue, frozen in time, and I wonder if he feels as cold as he looks. Zero always had a way of making himself look menacing and even though I knew what lie beneath the surface, it still drove daggers into my heart.

Though his face gives nothing away, I can see my own surprise mirrored in those violet eyes of his. He wasn't expecting me and for some reason, that hurts me more than it should. It meant that Zero was there for a reason that had nothing to do with me and before I can ask him what that reason is, his back is to me. Even though I should just let him go, I still find myself calling after him and when he doesn't stop, I follow.

"Stay back," his voice cuts through me like ice and I stop, clutching tightly at the air with balled fists at my sides while the rest of my body trembles.

"Zero," I didn't realize how much I missed saying his name or how much I wanted to hear him say mine. "What are you doing here, Zero?"

"Isn't it obvious?" He's watching me from over his shoulder. "Hunting."

Even after everything, the hatred is still buried deep within him and I can feel it rolling off of him in waves. My very existence repulses him and I am no longer Yuki, but an arrogant insatiable beast instead. But to me, he will always be Zero. I cannot find it in my heart to hate him and the harder I try, the more I want to surround myself with him.

"But there's nothing to hunt here," I know that I'm lying and he can tell too. I can see it in the way his shoulders tense as he looks forward again before turning his body to face me. I wonder if he's going to pull his gun on me next and fulfill his promise right there in that quiet alley as people wander past on the street. Even if I would want to stop him, Zero is stronger than I am. I have yet to learn how to master whatever abilities I possess and I have no weapon. I'm an easy target ― a _willing_ target.

I can see Zero considering this too as he regards me from a safe distance. I expect him to try but instead, he turns once more and continues walking away from me. This time, I really _should_ let him go, but...

_Stay out of trouble today, Yuki_.

Kaname should have known that was an impossible request. Trouble follows me wherever I go, or maybe I seek it out on purpose. But whatever the reason, I cannot stop myself from rushing after Zero as he disappears around a corner and back onto the street. By the time I reach the mouth of the alley, Zero is gone and I am alone again. It's the worst kind of loneliness; the kind that creeps into your bones and festers beneath your skin, making your whole body shiver and shake. I tell myself that I am not afraid but the atmosphere has changed drastically and I'm uncomfortable. I'm being watched and I can feel their eyes on me ― _his_ eyes on me.

Even though it quickens my steps and makes my palms sweat, there's a certain thrill that keeps me from breaking into a run despite my vulnerability. It almost feels like a game but I'm not sure what it means to be the victor.


End file.
